Sawatdee Kah!
This is the final blog entry written during the program. As time passes, further reflections and updates will be added. Please note that this entry was written in three countries: in Thailand, throughout the end of the program; in Japan, in the Tokyo airport on the way home; and, in the U.S. while at the District 5100 Conference in Pendleton, Oregon.
Visit from District 5100, and more
I am the only person in the program able to boast that a group of Rotarians from their district came to class to visit. I knew when I met Sharon Starr of the Lake Oswego Rotary that she was bringing a small group to Thailand to work on a project in the north, and I hoped she’d be able to sit in on a class as she’d requested. In addition to Sharon, the Rotarians who visited class were: Glenn Waller, Leslie Brunker, Charlene Bassine, Burt and Rosalie Czapsyz, David Bussman, and “Boss” Chotchauroj (from Thailand, former exchange student of Glenn Waller). They hosted 6 of us for a wonderful dinner the night before class, and then attended class and went on a small campus tour (including seeing my room). It was great to be able to show the program to people from my sponsoring district and I only wish there had been more time.
The visitors came when we were already deep into “Module Four: Conflict Transformation and Building a Sustainable Peace.” The day they sat in on class, we were discussing “Economic Recovery and Governance and Rule of Law.” This prompted after-class informal discussions about communism, socialism, capitalism, etc. RPCSP did a great job setting up an ideally communistic society of sorts. We all live in the exact same accommodation, the expectations from each of us is the same, we’re all given the same amount of $, during the day we eat together, on trips we do everything together, etc. In class we discussed that an idealized utopian society has never and cannot actually exist; that said, Rotary did an amazing job building this one.
Rayong Field Study
Our final field study was a weekend trip to Rayong, a beach community 4 hours from Bangkok by bus. The purpose of the visit was to see the Camillian Social Center, an amazing, healing, community space for people infected with HIV that was started by Father Giovanni, an Italian who participated in the RPCSP last year. The center is all one would hope it would be: a loving, kind, caring place for people of all ages, with no money or family, at all stages of HIV/AIDS.
It was interesting for me on many fronts; I already knew much of the information about HIV/AIDS presented to us by Father Giovanni and his staff since I’ve taught HIV/AIDS education before, have volunteered for numerous AIDS-Walks around the U.S., have friends who are HIV positive, and was hired to work for the People of Color AIDS Foundation in New Mexico (although I accepted a different job instead). While the information was not new to me, the center was, and the way HIV/AIDS is viewed/handled in Thailand is different (it’s thought of as dirty, carried by sex workers, even though many infected are men who frequent sex workers who in turn infect their loyal wives). Most fascinating was seeing the reactions and hearing input from fellow participants who were not as well versed; to hear the cultural views and learn, often through informal conversation during breaks, about what’s happening with the HIV/AIDS crisis in participants’ home countries. It was also interesting to me to have deeper discussions about homosexuality with people who have no connection to it and no understanding of it. Some of my closest friends, male and female, are gay, so I don’t even think about it anymore; it was interesting to be in the position of educator for the probing questions of people new to the subject.
Undoubtedly the most hilarious thing that happened was when Paski (theatre activist and Ayurvedic doctor) joked with me that he was going to ask Anas (Nigerian Judge and Imam [spiritual leader] and devout, while unbelievably open-minded, Muslim) to put his hands in the “magic box” – a big wooden box with holes for your hands to go in from the front so you can’t see anything; inside were heaps of condoms and a dildo – for practice putting on condoms without being able to see! Anas figured out what was inside at about the same time that Father Giovanni’s large, fun and boisterous personality discovered that a participant was trying out the magic box; to say it became a hilarious public event is an understatement, and Anas was an incredibly good sport, classy to the corps.
Personal Tragedy
On a personal note, I returned from the final Field Study to learn that, most unexpectedly, my cousin Laurel committed suicide. My age, my proclivity to international living and travel (she worked for the CDC – Center for Disease Control – as an international trainer), my way of eating, my physical body immune system issues, my love of nature and hiking and kayaking, my passion for serving others. . .Laurel and I shared it all. In terms of commonalities, she was my closest family member. Having only been in contact for about 3 years after a childhood separation due to divorce, we were amazed by our connection and had already talked about writing a book together, doing trainings together, traveling together. I was, and am, completely devastated. Getting the news was hard enough, but getting it while being across the world threw me into orbit. I thought of leaving the program early, but know that’s not what Laurel would have wanted; rather, I stayed and have done my best to celebrate her life by doing all the things she loved about the developing world.
The people in the program, specifically Paski, stepped up and helped me through the shock of it all. The staff was amazing, the participants were thoughtful each in their own special way, and I felt supported in the community of RPCSP; my host counselor even took me to a Wat to give offerings to and receive blessings from a Monk. Thanks from the bottom of my heart for supporting me through this difficult time.
Final week
The final week of the program was a whirlwind of closing classes (a day of Sri Lanka case study, a day of structured reflection on the course as a whole), rehearsals for our final group course project presentations, packing, etc. As appropriate, we were all fully in the “mourning” stage, with some people wishing they were home already and others not wanting it to end, holding on the every final moment. We laughed at spontaneous impersonations that participants did of one another, people gave out all the little gifts they’d brought from their home countries, people shared/copied photos, and people engaged in final gift shopping frenzies.
We did an oral evaluation of the whole program and people were asked for their ideas on all the different topics. Since international experiential education programs are what I’ve done for 15+ years, I’d been making notes about my suggestions for weeks. Tucker, the Deputy Director, asked me to implement some of my suggestions that very afternoon. I’m proud that I was able to use my experience to make suggestions that could change the course for the better.
Group Course Project Presentation, Graduation, and the Future of RCPSP
Early in the program we were assigned the task of presenting, at the final graduation, an aspect of our learning to the wider Rotary and University community. My group was created organically from the people who wanted to do something different than the typical Power Point Presentation. We 5, coming from DRCongo - Jennifer, Sri Lanka - Paskaran, India (Kashmir) - Assabah, Australia (Philippines) - Joy, and the U.S., initially decided to do something with participatory theatre. We had our similarities and differences, cultural and otherwise, and thoroughly enjoyed most everything about the project and working together. Paski and I took on the role as the process people, knowledgeable about theatrical techniques, and Joy, Jennifer and Assabah determined the topics for the content. The topic chosen was IBB, Interest Based Bargaining, and Paski suggested staging a “boxing match” that, after one round, morphed into the boxers calling on “their communities” – audience members – to join them onstage and give written input of their interests. The topic through which we would present this conflict resolution method, after much internal debate and input from Tucker, was the issue of traditional family owned shops vs. internationally owned hypermarkets and convenience stores.
Our graduation for RPCSP involved the Group Course Project Presentations, numerous speakers, an informal cocktail hour, dinner, and finally, the a formal certificate presentation. In attendance were Bob Scott from Canada (Chair, The Rotary Foundation Trustees International Assembly 2008), K.R. Ravidran from Sri Lanka (Trustee, The Rotary Foundation International Assembly 2008), Rotarians of Bangkok, Host Counselors, and special guests. Our final presentation at graduation was sandwiched between other groups’ Power Point Presentations, so despite their engaging content our interactivity was warmly welcomed. Despite planting our own participants in the audience, numerous non-group audience members volunteered to join even in the first round! We were shocked and happily surprised to get such a wonderful, participatory response. Quick, safe, interactive, physical games that everyone played together while standing began and ended our presentation, and the room was filled with laughter.
I accepted my certificate directly from the President of Chulalongkorn University. Bob Scott (aforementioned) also presented certificates to ½ of the participants. The program itself is currently up for review – we were batch 4 of 6 in the pilot – so Bob Scott and K.R. Ravidran visited us in order to inform their decision of the future of the program; both seemed keen to recommend that the program become a permanent part of the Rotary Education programs. As I type this sitting in the Tokyo airport on my way back to the U.S., meetings in Chicago are underway which will decide the future of the program. I will keep my fingers crossed that they decide to continue it, as I feel it is quite unique and impressive in the world of international adult education. The intercultural classroom, the focus on peace and conflict, the input/direction from worldwide accomplished speakers, the practical basis with academic theory (rather than the opposite), the unbelievable attention to detail, the staff’s service mentality, the generosity of Rotary to build the capacity of global peacemakers. . .truly amazing.
Final Parties
After the official graduation most of us returned to the Business Center, room 1005 of Viddaya Nives, our housing, the same room where I helped Paski type his papers, the same room where a bunch of us gathered to watch The Darjeeling Limited – wonderful flick to watch with people from India to hear their insider chatter, the same room where our group rehearsed the Group Course Project. That night was filled with laughter, often at the impressions done by the ever intelligently humorous Ellis (peace educator from the 7,107 islands of the Philippines – which he stated each time he introduced himself our ever-changing roster of speakers). It was filled with dancing, most notably Trimbak (City Manager from Bombay) teaching me 7 Indian dances complete with his stomping and pounding the floor so hard that the building security guard came to let us know the party needed to be much quieter. It was filled with Jenn Weidman visiting from the Rotary Foundation, finally able to meet everyone she’d been communicating with for almost a year. It was filled with Tucker (Deputy Director) and Pen (Tucker’s girlfriend from Cambodia), finally able to fully relax and be themselves since the program was over (wow do I know that feeling). It was filled with camaraderie, intensive 3-month long friends who weren’t ready to say goodbye to each other, people enjoying each others’ company for one of the last times as a group.
Unfortunately, on the final day of the program, Nancy (from Canada) received news that her father had been in an accident and was on life support; he died later that day. Her airplane ticket was changed to the next day. We supported her as much as we could and as much as she desired, and we did a moment of silence for her and her father at the final party (which took on a whole new feeling/meaning). (I later included her father in my offerings at the Wat and received blessings from a monk for her and him.)
We were responsible for creating our final party and I was one of 5 people on the party committee. Ellis and I co-planned the entertainment portion of the evening and co-emceed the event, my taking the more serious minor role and he being his hilarious self. Somehow I also ended up being responsible for gifts (which, in Thailand, is a big deal since you have to make sure you have the appropriate gift for absolutely everyone). Throughout the three months, Mariangela (from Brazil), Ann (from the U.S.), Nancy (from Canada) and I became friendly with the owner of a shop at the night market (after being introduced by one of the speakers in the program); Porntip ordered 25 white (the color of peace) silk scarves from her women weavers and was so unbelievably wonderful and wanting to support our program that she delivered them to campus just in time for the party. These were a welcome addition to the personal gifts we got for the 5 staff.
At the beginning of the party, I led the group in an informal appreciation closure called “Backwriter.” We all had blank labels/stickers and anonymously wrote compliments and notes of appreciation on them; once written we stuck them to each other’s backs. At the end of the casual writing time, which lasted about ½ hour as we wandered around and ate snacks, talked, and started the karaoke (have I mentioned how big karaoke is in Thailand?!), we got in a circle. Everyone had a blank piece of pretty paper and we all turned to our right so that a back was toward us; we each took the labels off of the backs and put them on the paper. Once completed, we gave the papers to their owners and everyone got to read and keep the sentiments. A few participants approached me later saying how much they appreciated the activity, asking me to read some of their appreciations (Joy, peace educator from Australia/Philippines who conducts workshops around the Asian region, was amazed by one that said “Saint” – and I totally, completely agree).
Songkran
Just after the program finished, I left on an overnight bus headed for Nan, a non-touristy village city in the north of the country near the Laos border to celebrate Songkran. Thailand’s annual Songkran Festival celebrates the Thai New Year, mid-April. Traditionally the festival lasts for 5 days, with each day having a different focus (community, family, elders, etc.). Overall the point of the festival is to cleanse for the New year through water including: receiving water blessings from monks and elders, washing Buddha statues, and, most famous, soaking every person who passes by with water. I’d heard about the Songkran Festival for years, but this was the first time I was in the country and able to participate; it makes sense that the water throwing happens at this time of year – April is the hot, dry season, and temperatures of 100+ with high humidity are the norm. The water on my body, therefore, felt wonderful, and I got used to walking around with wet clothes.
I was lucky enough to celebrate Songkran with a family in Nan. Each day brought different activities and I participated in: multi-hour services at the local community Wat (Buddhist temple), receiving numerous individual wrist string blessings from family elders in different ceremonies in various homes, and dancing on the street at night in front of a Wat with groups of locals who were playing drums to music blasted from a truck. Most fun was driving around town for 4 hours in the back of a pick-up truck with two other adults, 4 young teenagers, and two huge urns of water (100-or-so gallons each). We each had a small bucket used to individually collect water and throw bucketloads at every other passing truck also filled with people and urns of water. But not just at trucks - motorbike and bicycle riders, people walking, and especially groups on the side of the roads with hoses and water guns and their own urns. Our driver, the father of one of the aforementioned teens, and the other adults in the front of the truck in the dry safety behind windows, must have enjoyed hearing our screams after being doused with ice water because at one point we pulled into a driveway and he jumped out to buy two enormous ice-blocks that he then put in our urns so we could inflict the same hilarious discomfort on others. When we were running low on water, we were driven to a fire truck parked by the river whose sole job it was to use it’s hose to refill urns on the back of pick-ups (in addition to spraying us as much as possible).
I loved every minute of the festival and am grateful that I had the chance to participate as a local. Attending the festival gave me a few days to digest that the program had ended, and begin the slow process of reflecting on my experiences and learnings.
Poetic Reflections
It’s all about relationships.
Connections.
This program allowed me to connect with 17 other incredible professionals working around the world to create peace, each in their own way.
It allowed me to connect with 5+ amazing staff who all care deeply about making the world a better place, one tiny detail at a time.
It allowed me to meet and briefly get to know speakers from around the world, each of whom have unique gifts to share and the openness to continue the professional connection well past their one-two-three-or-four days with us.
It allowed me to briefly connect with villagers and NGO workers and government officials and children in four regions of two countries.
It allowed me to go deep within myself and reexamine my values, beliefs, morals, ethics, judgments, worldview, outlook, desires, and feelings of
despair on the state of conflict in the world and
hope for the people who can work toward changing it and
grief for the nonsensical loss of life and
worry for my newfound friends living in areas of conflict and
optimism that we can make a difference and
happiness of being with such amazing people in one of my favorite countries on earth and being surrounded by temporary and strong community, as I have been so many times before, and
luck at my being given the opportunity and
amazement at the little meaningful moments that will forever be planted in my warmest memories.
I am proud to have been part of this program as a participant, and hope in the future, if there is a future for the program, to be a part of it in some professional way – I already submitted a proposal to be a speaker, so we’ll see what happens.
I remain steadfast in my idea that the better people know one another, perhaps the less they’ll be in conflict or, at least, the less easily they’ll feel they can indiscriminately blow each other away. The emphasis on killing and war was intense in this program, as I expected it would be, but the difference is that I was sitting in the room with people who had personal stories of war, some of whom were returning home into the thick of war. I worry, intensely, that something will happen to my new friends, tears springing to my eyes right now simply with the too realistic thought of it. It was even mentioned in class one day, as if Assabah (journalist from Kashmir) had been reading my mind, that someday we’ll open the paper to learn that X person, peacemaker from X country, was killed as s/he attempted to make a better world.
I also remain true to my belief that I am extremely lucky to have been born in a non-global conflict zone, and I wonder if this might change in my lifetime. I struggle with returning to the U.S., where I have lived most of my life and is the place of my birth but, honestly, often does not feel like home. My values and visions and desires and cultural orientation is somewhat Asian, as confirmed for me by many, many Asian people (from different countries) over the last three months. Where did that come from? Why am I returning to the U.S.? Why don’t I yet speak Thai or another Asian language? How can I fit in wherever I live if I don’t feel I completely belong in the U.S. but in Asia I look and sound like I don’t belong? I know I belong in community, the 24/7 type of community similar to many of the programs I’ve participated in / led, but how to do it and where? Do I create the 24/7-experience as a business with different topics all the time? Some longer, some shorter, some for certain people (youth, adults, teachers, healers) with certain foci (peace, conflict resolution, communication, intercultural sensitivity, leadership, service, personal empowerment)? In different places around the world? How do I find the participants?
How could projects get funded? I’ve already started conversations about creating international projects with various participants in the program (peace education for youth of different ethnicities through participatory theatre in Sri Lanka, peace educator and facilitator training in East Timor, adventure teambuilding for peace and conflict workers in Brazil). Perhaps this is where my link to Rotary continues. . .
This is the final blog entry written during the program. As time passes, further reflections and updates will be added. Please note that this entry was written in three countries: in Thailand, throughout the end of the program; in Japan, in the Tokyo airport on the way home; and, in the U.S. while at the District 5100 Conference in Pendleton, Oregon.
Visit from District 5100, and more
I am the only person in the program able to boast that a group of Rotarians from their district came to class to visit. I knew when I met Sharon Starr of the Lake Oswego Rotary that she was bringing a small group to Thailand to work on a project in the north, and I hoped she’d be able to sit in on a class as she’d requested. In addition to Sharon, the Rotarians who visited class were: Glenn Waller, Leslie Brunker, Charlene Bassine, Burt and Rosalie Czapsyz, David Bussman, and “Boss” Chotchauroj (from Thailand, former exchange student of Glenn Waller). They hosted 6 of us for a wonderful dinner the night before class, and then attended class and went on a small campus tour (including seeing my room). It was great to be able to show the program to people from my sponsoring district and I only wish there had been more time.
The visitors came when we were already deep into “Module Four: Conflict Transformation and Building a Sustainable Peace.” The day they sat in on class, we were discussing “Economic Recovery and Governance and Rule of Law.” This prompted after-class informal discussions about communism, socialism, capitalism, etc. RPCSP did a great job setting up an ideally communistic society of sorts. We all live in the exact same accommodation, the expectations from each of us is the same, we’re all given the same amount of $, during the day we eat together, on trips we do everything together, etc. In class we discussed that an idealized utopian society has never and cannot actually exist; that said, Rotary did an amazing job building this one.
Rayong Field Study
Our final field study was a weekend trip to Rayong, a beach community 4 hours from Bangkok by bus. The purpose of the visit was to see the Camillian Social Center, an amazing, healing, community space for people infected with HIV that was started by Father Giovanni, an Italian who participated in the RPCSP last year. The center is all one would hope it would be: a loving, kind, caring place for people of all ages, with no money or family, at all stages of HIV/AIDS.
It was interesting for me on many fronts; I already knew much of the information about HIV/AIDS presented to us by Father Giovanni and his staff since I’ve taught HIV/AIDS education before, have volunteered for numerous AIDS-Walks around the U.S., have friends who are HIV positive, and was hired to work for the People of Color AIDS Foundation in New Mexico (although I accepted a different job instead). While the information was not new to me, the center was, and the way HIV/AIDS is viewed/handled in Thailand is different (it’s thought of as dirty, carried by sex workers, even though many infected are men who frequent sex workers who in turn infect their loyal wives). Most fascinating was seeing the reactions and hearing input from fellow participants who were not as well versed; to hear the cultural views and learn, often through informal conversation during breaks, about what’s happening with the HIV/AIDS crisis in participants’ home countries. It was also interesting to me to have deeper discussions about homosexuality with people who have no connection to it and no understanding of it. Some of my closest friends, male and female, are gay, so I don’t even think about it anymore; it was interesting to be in the position of educator for the probing questions of people new to the subject.
Undoubtedly the most hilarious thing that happened was when Paski (theatre activist and Ayurvedic doctor) joked with me that he was going to ask Anas (Nigerian Judge and Imam [spiritual leader] and devout, while unbelievably open-minded, Muslim) to put his hands in the “magic box” – a big wooden box with holes for your hands to go in from the front so you can’t see anything; inside were heaps of condoms and a dildo – for practice putting on condoms without being able to see! Anas figured out what was inside at about the same time that Father Giovanni’s large, fun and boisterous personality discovered that a participant was trying out the magic box; to say it became a hilarious public event is an understatement, and Anas was an incredibly good sport, classy to the corps.
Personal Tragedy
On a personal note, I returned from the final Field Study to learn that, most unexpectedly, my cousin Laurel committed suicide. My age, my proclivity to international living and travel (she worked for the CDC – Center for Disease Control – as an international trainer), my way of eating, my physical body immune system issues, my love of nature and hiking and kayaking, my passion for serving others. . .Laurel and I shared it all. In terms of commonalities, she was my closest family member. Having only been in contact for about 3 years after a childhood separation due to divorce, we were amazed by our connection and had already talked about writing a book together, doing trainings together, traveling together. I was, and am, completely devastated. Getting the news was hard enough, but getting it while being across the world threw me into orbit. I thought of leaving the program early, but know that’s not what Laurel would have wanted; rather, I stayed and have done my best to celebrate her life by doing all the things she loved about the developing world.
The people in the program, specifically Paski, stepped up and helped me through the shock of it all. The staff was amazing, the participants were thoughtful each in their own special way, and I felt supported in the community of RPCSP; my host counselor even took me to a Wat to give offerings to and receive blessings from a Monk. Thanks from the bottom of my heart for supporting me through this difficult time.
Final week
The final week of the program was a whirlwind of closing classes (a day of Sri Lanka case study, a day of structured reflection on the course as a whole), rehearsals for our final group course project presentations, packing, etc. As appropriate, we were all fully in the “mourning” stage, with some people wishing they were home already and others not wanting it to end, holding on the every final moment. We laughed at spontaneous impersonations that participants did of one another, people gave out all the little gifts they’d brought from their home countries, people shared/copied photos, and people engaged in final gift shopping frenzies.
We did an oral evaluation of the whole program and people were asked for their ideas on all the different topics. Since international experiential education programs are what I’ve done for 15+ years, I’d been making notes about my suggestions for weeks. Tucker, the Deputy Director, asked me to implement some of my suggestions that very afternoon. I’m proud that I was able to use my experience to make suggestions that could change the course for the better.
Group Course Project Presentation, Graduation, and the Future of RCPSP
Early in the program we were assigned the task of presenting, at the final graduation, an aspect of our learning to the wider Rotary and University community. My group was created organically from the people who wanted to do something different than the typical Power Point Presentation. We 5, coming from DRCongo - Jennifer, Sri Lanka - Paskaran, India (Kashmir) - Assabah, Australia (Philippines) - Joy, and the U.S., initially decided to do something with participatory theatre. We had our similarities and differences, cultural and otherwise, and thoroughly enjoyed most everything about the project and working together. Paski and I took on the role as the process people, knowledgeable about theatrical techniques, and Joy, Jennifer and Assabah determined the topics for the content. The topic chosen was IBB, Interest Based Bargaining, and Paski suggested staging a “boxing match” that, after one round, morphed into the boxers calling on “their communities” – audience members – to join them onstage and give written input of their interests. The topic through which we would present this conflict resolution method, after much internal debate and input from Tucker, was the issue of traditional family owned shops vs. internationally owned hypermarkets and convenience stores.
Our graduation for RPCSP involved the Group Course Project Presentations, numerous speakers, an informal cocktail hour, dinner, and finally, the a formal certificate presentation. In attendance were Bob Scott from Canada (Chair, The Rotary Foundation Trustees International Assembly 2008), K.R. Ravidran from Sri Lanka (Trustee, The Rotary Foundation International Assembly 2008), Rotarians of Bangkok, Host Counselors, and special guests. Our final presentation at graduation was sandwiched between other groups’ Power Point Presentations, so despite their engaging content our interactivity was warmly welcomed. Despite planting our own participants in the audience, numerous non-group audience members volunteered to join even in the first round! We were shocked and happily surprised to get such a wonderful, participatory response. Quick, safe, interactive, physical games that everyone played together while standing began and ended our presentation, and the room was filled with laughter.
I accepted my certificate directly from the President of Chulalongkorn University. Bob Scott (aforementioned) also presented certificates to ½ of the participants. The program itself is currently up for review – we were batch 4 of 6 in the pilot – so Bob Scott and K.R. Ravidran visited us in order to inform their decision of the future of the program; both seemed keen to recommend that the program become a permanent part of the Rotary Education programs. As I type this sitting in the Tokyo airport on my way back to the U.S., meetings in Chicago are underway which will decide the future of the program. I will keep my fingers crossed that they decide to continue it, as I feel it is quite unique and impressive in the world of international adult education. The intercultural classroom, the focus on peace and conflict, the input/direction from worldwide accomplished speakers, the practical basis with academic theory (rather than the opposite), the unbelievable attention to detail, the staff’s service mentality, the generosity of Rotary to build the capacity of global peacemakers. . .truly amazing.
Final Parties
After the official graduation most of us returned to the Business Center, room 1005 of Viddaya Nives, our housing, the same room where I helped Paski type his papers, the same room where a bunch of us gathered to watch The Darjeeling Limited – wonderful flick to watch with people from India to hear their insider chatter, the same room where our group rehearsed the Group Course Project. That night was filled with laughter, often at the impressions done by the ever intelligently humorous Ellis (peace educator from the 7,107 islands of the Philippines – which he stated each time he introduced himself our ever-changing roster of speakers). It was filled with dancing, most notably Trimbak (City Manager from Bombay) teaching me 7 Indian dances complete with his stomping and pounding the floor so hard that the building security guard came to let us know the party needed to be much quieter. It was filled with Jenn Weidman visiting from the Rotary Foundation, finally able to meet everyone she’d been communicating with for almost a year. It was filled with Tucker (Deputy Director) and Pen (Tucker’s girlfriend from Cambodia), finally able to fully relax and be themselves since the program was over (wow do I know that feeling). It was filled with camaraderie, intensive 3-month long friends who weren’t ready to say goodbye to each other, people enjoying each others’ company for one of the last times as a group.
Unfortunately, on the final day of the program, Nancy (from Canada) received news that her father had been in an accident and was on life support; he died later that day. Her airplane ticket was changed to the next day. We supported her as much as we could and as much as she desired, and we did a moment of silence for her and her father at the final party (which took on a whole new feeling/meaning). (I later included her father in my offerings at the Wat and received blessings from a monk for her and him.)
We were responsible for creating our final party and I was one of 5 people on the party committee. Ellis and I co-planned the entertainment portion of the evening and co-emceed the event, my taking the more serious minor role and he being his hilarious self. Somehow I also ended up being responsible for gifts (which, in Thailand, is a big deal since you have to make sure you have the appropriate gift for absolutely everyone). Throughout the three months, Mariangela (from Brazil), Ann (from the U.S.), Nancy (from Canada) and I became friendly with the owner of a shop at the night market (after being introduced by one of the speakers in the program); Porntip ordered 25 white (the color of peace) silk scarves from her women weavers and was so unbelievably wonderful and wanting to support our program that she delivered them to campus just in time for the party. These were a welcome addition to the personal gifts we got for the 5 staff.
At the beginning of the party, I led the group in an informal appreciation closure called “Backwriter.” We all had blank labels/stickers and anonymously wrote compliments and notes of appreciation on them; once written we stuck them to each other’s backs. At the end of the casual writing time, which lasted about ½ hour as we wandered around and ate snacks, talked, and started the karaoke (have I mentioned how big karaoke is in Thailand?!), we got in a circle. Everyone had a blank piece of pretty paper and we all turned to our right so that a back was toward us; we each took the labels off of the backs and put them on the paper. Once completed, we gave the papers to their owners and everyone got to read and keep the sentiments. A few participants approached me later saying how much they appreciated the activity, asking me to read some of their appreciations (Joy, peace educator from Australia/Philippines who conducts workshops around the Asian region, was amazed by one that said “Saint” – and I totally, completely agree).
Songkran
Just after the program finished, I left on an overnight bus headed for Nan, a non-touristy village city in the north of the country near the Laos border to celebrate Songkran. Thailand’s annual Songkran Festival celebrates the Thai New Year, mid-April. Traditionally the festival lasts for 5 days, with each day having a different focus (community, family, elders, etc.). Overall the point of the festival is to cleanse for the New year through water including: receiving water blessings from monks and elders, washing Buddha statues, and, most famous, soaking every person who passes by with water. I’d heard about the Songkran Festival for years, but this was the first time I was in the country and able to participate; it makes sense that the water throwing happens at this time of year – April is the hot, dry season, and temperatures of 100+ with high humidity are the norm. The water on my body, therefore, felt wonderful, and I got used to walking around with wet clothes.
I was lucky enough to celebrate Songkran with a family in Nan. Each day brought different activities and I participated in: multi-hour services at the local community Wat (Buddhist temple), receiving numerous individual wrist string blessings from family elders in different ceremonies in various homes, and dancing on the street at night in front of a Wat with groups of locals who were playing drums to music blasted from a truck. Most fun was driving around town for 4 hours in the back of a pick-up truck with two other adults, 4 young teenagers, and two huge urns of water (100-or-so gallons each). We each had a small bucket used to individually collect water and throw bucketloads at every other passing truck also filled with people and urns of water. But not just at trucks - motorbike and bicycle riders, people walking, and especially groups on the side of the roads with hoses and water guns and their own urns. Our driver, the father of one of the aforementioned teens, and the other adults in the front of the truck in the dry safety behind windows, must have enjoyed hearing our screams after being doused with ice water because at one point we pulled into a driveway and he jumped out to buy two enormous ice-blocks that he then put in our urns so we could inflict the same hilarious discomfort on others. When we were running low on water, we were driven to a fire truck parked by the river whose sole job it was to use it’s hose to refill urns on the back of pick-ups (in addition to spraying us as much as possible).
I loved every minute of the festival and am grateful that I had the chance to participate as a local. Attending the festival gave me a few days to digest that the program had ended, and begin the slow process of reflecting on my experiences and learnings.
Poetic Reflections
It’s all about relationships.
Connections.
This program allowed me to connect with 17 other incredible professionals working around the world to create peace, each in their own way.
It allowed me to connect with 5+ amazing staff who all care deeply about making the world a better place, one tiny detail at a time.
It allowed me to meet and briefly get to know speakers from around the world, each of whom have unique gifts to share and the openness to continue the professional connection well past their one-two-three-or-four days with us.
It allowed me to briefly connect with villagers and NGO workers and government officials and children in four regions of two countries.
It allowed me to go deep within myself and reexamine my values, beliefs, morals, ethics, judgments, worldview, outlook, desires, and feelings of
despair on the state of conflict in the world and
hope for the people who can work toward changing it and
grief for the nonsensical loss of life and
worry for my newfound friends living in areas of conflict and
optimism that we can make a difference and
happiness of being with such amazing people in one of my favorite countries on earth and being surrounded by temporary and strong community, as I have been so many times before, and
luck at my being given the opportunity and
amazement at the little meaningful moments that will forever be planted in my warmest memories.
I am proud to have been part of this program as a participant, and hope in the future, if there is a future for the program, to be a part of it in some professional way – I already submitted a proposal to be a speaker, so we’ll see what happens.
I remain steadfast in my idea that the better people know one another, perhaps the less they’ll be in conflict or, at least, the less easily they’ll feel they can indiscriminately blow each other away. The emphasis on killing and war was intense in this program, as I expected it would be, but the difference is that I was sitting in the room with people who had personal stories of war, some of whom were returning home into the thick of war. I worry, intensely, that something will happen to my new friends, tears springing to my eyes right now simply with the too realistic thought of it. It was even mentioned in class one day, as if Assabah (journalist from Kashmir) had been reading my mind, that someday we’ll open the paper to learn that X person, peacemaker from X country, was killed as s/he attempted to make a better world.
I also remain true to my belief that I am extremely lucky to have been born in a non-global conflict zone, and I wonder if this might change in my lifetime. I struggle with returning to the U.S., where I have lived most of my life and is the place of my birth but, honestly, often does not feel like home. My values and visions and desires and cultural orientation is somewhat Asian, as confirmed for me by many, many Asian people (from different countries) over the last three months. Where did that come from? Why am I returning to the U.S.? Why don’t I yet speak Thai or another Asian language? How can I fit in wherever I live if I don’t feel I completely belong in the U.S. but in Asia I look and sound like I don’t belong? I know I belong in community, the 24/7 type of community similar to many of the programs I’ve participated in / led, but how to do it and where? Do I create the 24/7-experience as a business with different topics all the time? Some longer, some shorter, some for certain people (youth, adults, teachers, healers) with certain foci (peace, conflict resolution, communication, intercultural sensitivity, leadership, service, personal empowerment)? In different places around the world? How do I find the participants?
How could projects get funded? I’ve already started conversations about creating international projects with various participants in the program (peace education for youth of different ethnicities through participatory theatre in Sri Lanka, peace educator and facilitator training in East Timor, adventure teambuilding for peace and conflict workers in Brazil). Perhaps this is where my link to Rotary continues. . .
